Dear hiflhsdapofyhoarjlwm

Please don’t make me wait for another three months. Just please don’t.

Looking back is not healthy for the heart my friend. if you only know what’s happening to me now, i shouldn’t have thought of you at the first place  cause right now i’m hoping again. You shouldn’t have talked to me because that made me realize what great joy a conversation with you brings.

For the past three months i was able to move along with my life. I was without you but i felt alright. Now you’re face is creeping into my mind, for sure it’ll haunt me for the coming nights.

Dear hiflhsdapofyhoarjlwm

I miss you today, i never thought i’d still miss you after a long time of trying to go on ahead in life without you. And i found myself looking back again, to those little memories i really treasure , for they are one of my priceless possessions.

I am not hurting but i’m longing for you my dear friend. I wish you can just appear right beside me , and just say you’re okay and you’re happy. But it doesn’t work that way.

But i know for sure that i will grow old and still remember every detail of your beautiful face, ages will pass but i’ll still recognize your voice, the way you sing, the way you laugh , the way you bring life to empty words. I’d even remember how you would look up in the sky and say you don’t see any beauty but i will always say that the sky is wonderful just as we all are, Just as you and i are when we’re together.

AWAKENED

Couple of hours before i wrote the entry below, i wrote about not having compassion and the heart for the lost and in need. I admitted that at some point i was just so excited about what God would be doing in my life, i forgot that i should be more excited about what He would be doing in others. And yes , i was so full of me, i was so full of  thinking about the future, like having a nice house and nice car. But then i confessed that and asked God to open my eyes to whatever he wants me to do and stir my heart so hard that i wont be able to sleep. And then…

April 11, 2012

Second entry for today.

Tonight as I was praying, the Spirit led me into interceding for those who are being persecuted for Christ, for the abuser and the abused, for the brain washed people, for the many souls that haven’t heard of Jesus name, for the people who were affected in the recent 8.7 quake in Indonesia just this afternoon, and for my friends whom I let to come and go in my life without encountering the Love of Christ.

And I cried, I cried real tears. Because I see people in my head, I see them on the news, I see them on the streets, and I just let it go. I was a “Christian” who wasn’t doing anything so that these people could encounter God, I wasn’t moving in behalf of Jesus. I was like one of the many comfy Christians who sits on church and prays, but don’t do actions. I cried because God impressed in my heart the reality that many people are bound to hell, and while there is time for me and for the many others to act on Love and be the hands and feet of Jesus, we don’t. Because we think, they are plenty “Missionaries” around the world, oh indeed there must be a lot, but some are like me , living in the comforts and waiting to be taken to eternity.

And I told God that I am willing now, that He can use me now, the harvest is great but the workers are few. I want to be a real worker now, I wanna go to the field and see the harvest for myself, and do what I can do.

And then I knew my heart was really aching, wondering why there had to be so many victims, so many needy, so many people who suffer each and every day. But as I opened my bible , God showed me

Lamentations 3:32-33

Though He brings grief, He also shows compassion because of the greatness of His unfailing Love. For he does not enjoy hurting people or causing them sorrow.

It’s not me who is compassionate. God is compassionate, and if I am able to hurt for these people how much more our God. If I cry for these people, I am sure He is crying too. His heart longs for them, every single one of them. I can hear Him saying “If only they’d turn back to me, if only they’d come back to me”.

My God, have you given me the Heart now? Have you given me the heartache now for the lost and the needy. This heart that I was just searching for , but now it is mine. I know I have a lot to know, and I know i am unworthy , but You say I am and it’s all because of Your grace my God. Equip me father, I know Jesus would be coming soon, and there are so many who aren’t prepared for His return, so many who don’t even know He came and will come back.

The beauty of waiting

Last night was a a great youth service. It was our february special and of course it was filled with love. I remember blogging about waiting for that one special person and be with him/her for the rest of your life, it’s just wonderful isn’t it?

Well last night i was reminded that there is beauty in patiently waiting  for that person which God is molding to become your lifetime partner. And as you wait you must allow yourself to go into the process where in God will mold you to become the right one for your right one. Makes sense right? And waiting means a lot of things. It means running away from sexual temptation, it means growing spiritually, it means learning to be come a righteous man or woman, it means running away from anything that will hinder you from being pure and holy before your future spouse and of course before your God.

I remember back when i was ten years old i already asked God to help me become the woman He wants me to be and guide me into knowing a man who He wanted me to be my husband. I am one of those girls who wanted a first and last relationship. And up to now i have never dated anyone. It isn’t because i never found someone attractive or it isn’t because i’ve never felt how it was to be in love, it is because i prayed and God is certainly molding me and also the man for me, and it is because my desire is in abiding in God’s will & time and not in my own selfish desire and shallow understanding of love. 

But don’t get me wrong you don’t sin once you have gotten into previous relationships. It’s just that when you really seek God there’s no need to be in and out of relationships, you get what i’m saying? Because God has a purpose for you and He doesn’t want you to get involve emotionally and much more physically with someone who isn’t going to be your lifetime partner. He wants your heart to be given to that right man/woman who will honor you and who will Honor God in your relationship. And i also do believe that sex is for marriage, for married couples alone.

Isn’t it beautiful when you’re already in front of the altar, in front of the people you love and in front of God, and know that this person beside me is the only one i have ever loved this much, this person beside me is the one i have waited for ever so patiently, this person beside me is the only one, and this person beside me was from God. And you get to say the sincerest i love you’s and vows. And you get to have that kiss also.

Boys and girls of this generation i tell you waiting is one of the best decisions you will ever make. We are young and we tend to be aggressive in different things, DO NOT RUSH. The purpose of courtship & dating is in preparation for marriage. When you start courting or when someone starts courting you take a really close look and think ” Is this the person i want to share the rest of my life with?” and if the answer is no, then don’t go any further. Because without wanting that man or woman to be your lifetime partner is a relationship without a purpose. It is super cool to stay single. again i say it is super cool. Paul even wrote that He wished everyone is just single as he was (1 Corinthians 7:7).. But of course God has unique plans for each of us.

So to end this post. Everybody run after God and He will give you the desires of your heart. He will lead you into a wonderful relationship, and He will strengthen you. And again i will say this 

Fall in love with Christ first before falling in love with someone else, then make sure you keep falling in love with Christ.

Trisha

Keep your eyes fixed!

Fall in love with Christ first before falling in love with someone else, then make sure you keep falling in Love with Christ! :)

Dearest Friend

You don’t have to say such things. You don’t have to sound cool for anyone to love you. Well for me, i love you even without all the cool stuff you put up for yourself. I love you the way you are, simple, happy, wise and caring. That’s who you are to me.

But i guess you already know that i love you so you seek other people’s acceptance, you seek the affection of this society, and so you indulge yourself with the pressure but you end up being not yourself. You don’t have to say you do this and do that when you really don’t, you don’t have to pretend you watch this and listen to that when in fact it disgusts you, you don’t have to make all the girls like you or love you, and you don’t have to sin just because when you do the world approves of you.

I believe in the goodness of your heart. I believe in your dreams of a healthy and successful life. A life lived surrounded by the people you really love, and a life lived in constant challenge and victories. 

You are young and you can do anything. You have the talent in your hands, in your heart and in your mind. You have the ideas that can affect everyone in a good way. You are beautiful, you are strong and you will always be until the end of days.

Please do not make it hard for yourself, please avoid these vices, for you might end up in your death bed at such an early age. For you might end up destroying the relationship you have with you future spouse and your children. Please set yourself free from all your insecurities, and know that God loves you and only he can satisfy you. Please listen and take this into your heart until there is time for you. 

Go and look within yourself and see that there is goodness lying underneath the layers of all the lies, and all the wickedness , that you thought was really you. You are good, you are kind and wonderful.

When you are seconds away from your last breath you’d probably wanna die being who you really are and you probably wanna know where you are gonna go.

With much love,

Trish

life is!

“Nakakainis ang buhay na ito oooh” the voice sang with all it’s might, sounded like some OPM rock song. I heard after passing the SBMA main gate. I thought to myself “What kind of life is he talking about? I feel sorry for him,because life is good.”

I left our house at the most unlikely time of 2:56 pm. Up to now i still wonder what went into my head that caused me to walk happily while the sun was hurting my skin. All i had with me was my journals and my bible. I was about to  buy myself a drink along the way when i saw a man and a little girl walking hand by hand. Right at that moment i sensed a little glimpse of love so i decided to follow them, keeping a 10 meter distance so i wouldn’t creep them out. As i continued to walk behind them, i observed that this man could be and really looks like he was the little girl’s grandpa. And after that realization i kinda saw a little more glimpse of love, as i get very touched seeing grandparents with their grand children.

So, there were times that i thought i lost them because they walked fast. They took some turns and i was happy i still caught them. Then i was thinking “where are they going?” and also wondered what went into their heads and decided to walk this time in the afternoon just like me. I kept on walking and talking to myself. I was tempted to buy myself a drink whenever i pass by a store but i was so afraid i’d lose them, so i deprived myself from refreshment.

And after 15 minutes i think, i finally saw them stop and put down their little bag. They settled for a shade under a tree at the sea shore. So i got closer and closer and realized what they came for, just so the little girl could play at the playground (where i also used to play) , just so grandpa could feel some breeze and just so they have some sort of bonding time. And it almost made me wanna cry. But crying would be awkward specially if you’re just by yourself. And so i looked for a bench and sat , still watching the little girl and his grandpa. I noticed that grandpa got some tattoos on his leg (yeah he was a cool grandpa) , and after a couple of minutes the little girl and her grandpa started chewing some food they brought with them.

After appreciating the two. i started appreciating everyone and everything that was around me. God blessed me with some clouds so that as i was sitting there, the sun wasn’t as hot as it should be. And i was glad that there were still a few people who decided to leave the comforts of their homes, who decided to forget facebook for awhile, and who decided to go for a walk because they know that there is still beauty outside. The whole park was silent except from the sounds of leaves dancing with the breeze and little voices. But except that everything was beautifully silent and peaceful.

And then as i sat i again thought about the song i heard along my journey. Whoever wrote that song was definitely missing out in all the beautiful things in life. I know life can sometimes be just so hard , but sometimes that’s what makes it beautiful, do you agree? Think about this, if our lives were all about just being happy and jolly what’s so amazing about that? That’s plain and simple. Like a movie with no conflict.

But i do understand him, that there will be times when you just wanna throw everything near you and shout out of pain or anger, because none of the things you wanted is happening with you and the people around you. But maybe the writer was missing out on the little things that makes life wonderful. Because happiness is a choice, he chose to write a song about how awful his life turned out to be. While the others such as that grandpa and that cute little girl, decided that it would be lovely to step out of their homes and walk to the shore at three pm.

Life is wonderful, it’s good and it’s beautiful. And you were given the power to decide whether you’ll bore yourself in your room in front of your computer , cry for the same heart ache a former lover has caused you or get out of the shade and feel the sun upon your skin, and move on and rise up from every pain. Life is all about having hard times and getting back up on your feet again, it’s all about being grateful no matter how difficult it gets and it’s all about living in love and choosing to live.

God blessed you with life, so live it.